Game 19: Lions 23, Browns 20

How 'bout that Cleveland offense? On the very first play, Jared DeVries powers in on Kelly Butler's outside shoulder and smacks the ball out of Derek Anderson's hand. Corey Redding falls on it, and the Lions have already taken the ball from the Browns.

On the second play, Shaun McDonald bails out Kitna's bacon after HE gets hit while he throws and puts up a ridiculous lob. Even though they start the drive at the Cleveland 22, Detroit ends up settling for a FG. You'll never guess what they did on 3rd-and-10 from the Browns 12. They threw a pass short of the first down! 3-0, Detroit.

Both of Cleveland's kickoff returns have been out across the 35. It's the Martz Effect. The Browns completely ruin a nice long drive inside the Detroit 10 with some of the most inept offensive management you're ever going to see. They called a timeout. Jamal Lewis ran to the 1. They committed a delay of game. They called ANOTHER timeout. Lewis ran down to the 2. They committed a false start. Anderson tried to force a ball into a crowd and was intercepted by Ernie Sims. Absolutely hilarious.

Oh for God's sake, they are playing the fucking VIVA VIAGRA spot EVERY GOD DAMN COMMERCIAL BREAK. Not only are these assholes celebrating that they can't get it up, they're celebrating how whipped they are. "At the end of the day I'm not a guy who'll stray." "I'm sick of the road, I can't wait to get home." Not, you'll notice, "I cashed out my 401(k), bought a ragtop Chevrolet, looking for a drunk chick to lay." Viagra is actually a feminist conspiracy, isn't it?

That offensive offensive sequence seemed to take the air out of Cleveland's defense, too. Or maybe they're also sick of the non-stop Viva Viagra marathon. Tatum Bell ripped up the middle untouched for 20. Casey Fitzsimmons took a screen pass for 17 with no Brown touching him for a long time. Detroit starts the 2nd quarter at the Cleveland 23, but doesn't get much farther. They cover everybody and pressure Jon Kitna well to force an incompletion on 3rd-and-5. Detroit's FG is good, though, for a 6-0 Lions lead.

Charlie Frye in at QB for Cleveland. They're really working on getting the ball to Braylon Edwards. He has three catches already, two nice ones during the opening drive. Jason Wright is the replacement for Jamal Lewis. Browns make it out to midfield before they're set back by a holding penalty. Frye gets flushed upfield on 3rd-and-5 and is tripped up by Shaun Cody.

Bernie Kosar just described man-mountain Ted Washington as "two Frostys short of 400".

Shaun McDonald has been Kitna's main target tonight; he's been thrown to at least six times already. Shaun found his way into a gap in the zone for a 25-yard catch, but when Detroit gets to midfield, they start going backwards with penalties and eventually punt.

Frye drives Cleveland into Detroit territory, hitting Steve Heiden for 14 on 3rd-and-2 to get out of a hole, and scrambling for 14 out near midfield right before the 2:00 warning. A bit later he is stopped short on 4th-and-2 to turn the ball back over to the Lions with 1:00 left in the half. You'd sure figure much won't come of that lost gamble.

Unfortunately for Cleveland, Kitna catches fire, hitting Troy Walters twice, ex-Rams Brandon Middleton for 20 and McDonald for 14 and the TD to go up 13-0. 28-second TD drive.

With :20 left in the half, Frye's long pass is picked off by Gerald Alexander, who returns it back inside the Cleveland 20. Kenny Byrd's FG at the gun gives Detroit 10 points in just under a minute and a 16-0 lead at halftime.

With JT O'Sullivan in at QB, the Lions open the 2nd half with a 3-and-out.

Derek Anderson enters as QB for Cleveland and hits TE Ryan Krause for 9 to get them across midfield. On a 4th-and-1, he hits Krause again to keep the drive alive, then finds another TE, Darnell Dinkins, for 16. They get to the Lion 20 and have an actual chance to score, but Phil Dawson misses a 36-yarder. The Browns are falling apart before our eyes.

Detroit takes over with large doses of large TJ Duckett. He takes a short pass for 20. After O'Sullivan gets a short gain with a keeper on 4th-and-1, Duckett gets 17 on a 3rd-and-10 pass, and a couple of plays later, works a run outside for a 15-yard TD to a cascade of boos from a bunch of PO'ed Cleveland fans. 23-0, Detroit.

With the crowd chanting for Brady Quinn, Ken Dorsey is the lucky stiff who gets to run the Brown offense next. A couple of passes to Travis Wilson take Dorsey and co. into Detroit territory. A DPI gives Cleveland the ball at the 1, and when they immediately false start to move it back, it looks like it'll be comedy of errors time again. But Dorsey hits Krause at the 1 and Jason Wright runs it in from there to put Cleveland on the board. 23-7 Lions.

Dan Orlovsky at QB for Detroit. A holding penalty shuts this drive down right away, the Lions 3-and-out, and...

... the Brady Quinn era begins, to the delight of the home crowd. His presence seems to energize the Cleveland offense. Chris Barclay takes off with a screen pass like he's shot out of a cannon for 30. Quinn hits 4 straight to set Cleveland up at Detroit's 4, including a nice 11-yard sideline pass to Maurice Mann. 2nd-and-goal from the 4, Quinn rolls right and hits Efrem Hill right after he's made a move on the Detroit DB for a TD. Heck of a drive for Quinn, though he can't come up with a completion for the 2-point conversion. 23-13 Lions.

Orlovsky drives Detroit back across midfield, but then they go to the run to burn up clock and Cleveland timeouts. They pin Cleveland at the 8 with the punt and turn it back over to Quinn.

I'm not sure if the star of this last drive should be Quinn or Jerome Harrison, because Quinn throws to Harrison 7 or 8 times. Brady shows a good arm, he moves the offense with a good tempo and makes quick decisions, but his only real downfield pass this drive is a 24-yarder to Steve Sanders. And a nice one that was. But again, just having Quinn behind center seems to have put a spark in the other offensive players. Harrison dives over the goal line with a short pass with 0:24 left to make this suddenly a close game, 23-20, Lions.

Detroit recovers the onside kick, though, and takes a knee to come away with the win.

It's not uncommon in preseason for the team that lost to have the better game. That seems to have come true for Cleveland with Quinn's fine first outing. Yes, he was throwing out of the no-huddle offense and I'm pretty sure Detroit was in soft prevent defense the whole time, but I don't think that's as important as the way the team responded to him. Romeo has to pull the trigger now and make Brady the starter if he has any illusion of coaching in Cleveland in 2008.

Detroit went on the road and dominated a bad team. They're usually awful on the road. The Lions are flickering signs that they are ready to move up to the next level and are ready to at least challenge for a playoff berth. Duckett's performance was valuable since they can't be sure when Kevin Jones will be 100%. Some good playmaking by the defensive line, too; also a good thing if they're to improve over last year.

19 down, 46 to go. Up next: I've got a stack of unmarked tapes here so it could be a surprise. I think it's going to be Tennessee-New England. (Vikings-Jets, actually.)