Wow, after that brutal Raiders performance, I deserve a good long 3-hour look at the San Diego Chargers cheerleaders next....
WHAT, THE CHARGERS ARE ON THE ROAD?!?!? With their amazing cheerleaders, they should get to play all four preseason games at home.
Greg (Thank God He's Not Bryant) Gumbel and Dan Fouts (not Dierdorf?) on the call for CBS. Unfortunately, since this is preseason, there'll be a lot of holding back tonight, unlike the legendary Bourbon Bowl that Fouts called with Brent Musberger.
Also, CBS can go straight to HELL for describing Ben Roethlisberger's lucky desperation swipe at Nick Harper in the playoffs a few years ago as "The Tackle" in their pregame credits. THE TACKLE is CLEARLY Mike Jones' play on the last play of Super Bowl XXXIV. THERE CAN BE NO OTHER.
Falcons win the toss. Matt Ryan and Michael Turner take over at their 23. Let's see if they are as machine-like as they were in St. Louis last week. Play-action to Tony Gonzalez for 9. Turner bounces off a couple of tackles for 3 and the first. Turner up the middle for 4. Sideline pass for Roddy White is horrible; third down. Pass pressure from Shawne Merriman likely forced the bad throw. Chargers blitz; Atlanta picks it up and goes deep for White but the only guy who can make a play on the ball is Quentin Jammer for San Diego. Incomplete, let's bring in the punt team.
Falcons blitz right off the bat but Philip Rivers finds BRANDON MANUMALEUNA for close to 10. Looks like LT is getting the game off tonight. Darren Sproles cuts back and gets a first down at the 37. Let's see, this drive started at the 25. Blatant horse collar tackle by John Abraham on Sproles on a 3rd-down pass racks San Diego up at the Falcon 38. Good blitz pickup by Sproles gives Rivers time to wing a pretty sideline pass to Vincent Jackson, who makes a pretty catch over Brent Grimes at the 10. Sproles speeds in from there on 2nd-and-goal with another cutback off the right side. Sweet drive there by the Chargers.
San Diego 7, Atlanta 0.
Thomas Brown amazingly doesn't fumble the kickoff return for Atlanta despite being tripped by Legedu Naanee and falling on his face at full speed. Ouch. Falcons at their 30. Big hole right up the middle for Turner for 11. Play-action pass to Turner for 4. Give FB Ovie Mughelli credit for the big hole on the earlier run. Ryan finds Gonzalez for a first down into Charger territory. 22-yard pass to White down to the 19 as Ryan's line continues to get him plenty of time. Turner bangs down to the 12 on 2 handoffs. 3rd-3. Ryan guns to Brian Finneran, who breaks 3 tackles inside the 10 yard line and dives into the end zone.
San Diego 7, Atlanta 7.
Sproles returns the kickoff to the 35, and look out, gets a screen from there and gets out to the 50 with it. Dang is that guy fast. Jacob Hester moves in at tailback now, and gains nothing around right end. He's stuffed again on 2nd down. They bring Sproles back in for another screen, but Kory Biermann, the Rams' tormentor from last week, catches up to him after 6-7 yards to instigate a punting incident.
Falcons start at the 9. Just 3 up the middle for Turner. Chargers definitely look sturdier at the line than the Rams did last week. They certainly look sturdier blowing up a tricky pitchout to Jerious Norwood on 3rd and short. The second quarter will open with a Falcon punt.
End of first quarter: San Diego 7, Atlanta 7.
Atlanta's furious blitzing gets San Diego into an early hole after the punt but Rivers fires a 20-yard pass to Malcolm Floyd at the 31 for a first down. Michael Bennett now getting action at tailback. They advance to midfield, then, facing 3rd-and-17 after a penalty, Rivers fires to Chris Chambers breaking to the sideline for 18. Beat yet another Atlanta blitz. Ball at the Falcon 34. This is going to be a 200-yard drive, the rate at which the Charger line is committing penalties. Huge blitz over right tackle drops Rivers for a big loss. 3rd-and-24 near midfield. The Falcons don't blitz, and San Diego runs their favorite play, a screen, to Bennett, he turns the right corner and is GONE for a 49-yard TD. Blocking out in front of Bennett, guard Louis Vasquez takes out THREE Falcons at the same time.
San Diego 14, Atlanta 7.
John McCain, ER, Mike Smith, is yelling at his defense hard enough after that TD to induce an aneurysm. Start the Falcons at their 30. Fine blitz pickup by Jason Snelling gives Ryan time to hit Michael Jenkins out at midfield on 3rd-and-8. Turner's still in for Atlanta, sweeping left for 5. Great play action as Ryan hits Marty Booker on the sideline for a first down at the Charger 40. Ryan barely avoids a sack on the blitz and dives to the 30. Turner cruises outside for 6. Chargers are tackling Turner a lot better than the Rams did last week, too. They stuff him at the 26 to get to 3rd-and-6. 4-man rush here as Antonio Cromartie stops Norwood short with a shot to the head, eventually getting flagged for it. Fouts talks about there being a NEW rule about that this year? A shot to the head like that should ALWAYS be illegal.
And now we have referee Alfonso Ribeiro telling us that it was a legal hit? I guess I'll never understand the NFL rulebook. It apparently looooves unnecessary hard shots to receivers' heads.
I liked Alfonso Riberio much better in Fresh Prince of Bel-Air than when he's ignoring guys getting blasted in the head by defensive players.
Oh. Alberto Riveron. OK.
Atlanta lined up to go for it on 4th-and-2, but San Diego called timeout, and Mike Smith then changed his mind. Jason Elam hits from 40. Rarely is a timeout more valuable than that one just was; it may have saved the Chargers 4 points.
San Diego 14, Atlanta 10.
Rivers leaves the game having thrown for 185 yards. San Diego's opening against THE RAIDERS? Frack, Rivers is going to throw for 600 yards. Billy Volek's in now for the Chargers, though. They just showed Charlie Whitehurst on the sideline - he looks like one of the Geico cavemen. LET ME BE MYSELF! No blitz for Atlanta here on 3rd-and-7, and Volek hits Floyd for 18 to the 41. Chargers are 6 for 7 on 3rd down; Atlanta can't figure anything out. 2:00 warning.
Suddenly San Diego doesn't look all that interested in scoring again, running Bennett smack up the middle twice for little gain. Craig "Buster" Davis then successfully juggles in a catch at the Atlanta 35. Another third down conversion! Bennett nearly scores again on a screen. He does get inside the 15. Volek beats a blitz with a sidearm throw to Floyd inside the 5 and he reaches out to the goal line with the ball for an apparent touchdown. It's reviewed but the call stands; TD for Floyd.
San Diego 21, Atlanta 10.
1:11 left in the first half. Due to circumstances beyond my control, not involving Merriman's retarded blue Mohawk, I'm going to have to cut bait for the night at halftime. Falcons take over at their 32. Ryan to Booker for 20. He fires to White inside the Charger 30 a couple of plays later. They use their last timeout with 15 seconds left and the ball at the Charger 22. Man did Ryan get them back downfield quickly. Good first half for both QBs, though Jammer nearly intercepts Ryan inside the 5 before Atlanta settles on an Elam 39-yard FG.
Halftime score: San Diego 21, Atlanta 13.
Back to work. Aw shucks, I missed ANOTHER preseason interview with Falcons owner Arthur Blank. Guy is on TV more than Obama. Chargers start the 2nd half with the ball at their 20. End-around left to Naanee for 8. Bigger guy and harder to tackle than I'd been thinking. Mike Tolbert gets 2.0001 on 3rd-and-2 to keep the drive going. Smallish RB Gartrell Johnson having trouble doing anything this drive other than getting hit hard. Volek converts ANOTHER third down, to Floyd across the 45. Johnson gets to midfield to leave 3rd-and-6. Gee, I wonder if San Diego will convert it. Yep, screen pass to Turner beats a blitz after the referees wave off a flag for a dirty-looking block by Kynan Forney on Peria Jerry. 3rd-and-4 now at the Falcon 44. Could it be - NO, it should have been another first down because his line got him a gigantic hole on a draw play, but Hester is too damn slow to get through there and gets shut down by Erik Coleman. Bennett, Sproles, Tomlinson and probably Jack Tripper are all San Diegans I can think of who would have broken that play big. Nate Kaeding then yaks a 50-yard FG attempt hard left. Clutch. Must have been all that wind in the Georgia Dome.
Falcons have super field position at their 39, Ryan remains in. Turner's still in, too. They're even going no-huddle. Effort doesn't pay off; on 3rd down Ryan nearly throws what would have been a BRUTAL INT right to Steve Gregory, who somehow manages to drop a ball that's all but handed to him. I don't even know who or where the intended Falcon receiver was on the play. Nobody around for ten yards but Chargers. They settle for a punt and get the ball back at their 19.
Charlie Whitehurst takes the just-invented wheel for San Diego. Johnson is still getting whaled on, but he bounces off a tough shot from Curtis Logton for 13 and a first. Whitehurst gets forever to throw on third down before deciding to scramble but gets cut down early by a rapidly closing Grimes.
Chris Redman the new QB for Atlanta at the 20. They overcome a holding penalty with completions to Justin Peelle, Booker and Finneran, then overcome a tripping penalty with a screen to Thomas Brown for 15. Perfectly set-up play. Redman hits his fifth straight pass out across midfield as the third quarter runs out.
End of third quarter: San Diego 21, Atlanta 13.
Atlanta's getting big holes for Snelling to run through. He's down to the 35 on a couple of handoffs. Naked bootleg to Booker on an out for 12-13 down to the 22. Chargers shut down Snelling for the first time at the 21. Redman's eighth straight completion is to Booker at the 11 for another first. Snelling drops a swing pass to end Redman's run. So how does Redman score after going 9-for-10 on the drive? He RUNS it in, spinning behind Thomas Brown's nice blitz pickup. Bless Mike Smith, the Falcons kick the PAT here, where I imagine they'd be going for two in the regular season.
San Diego 21, Atlanta 20.
Bennett breaks for 11 off left tackle after Tolbert gets knocked spaghetti-legged at the end of a 9-yard reception. Whitehurst drills a 16-yard slant to Craig Davis. 8:00 left. Lofton breaks up a deep throw on 3rd down that would have been a huge gainer. Big play there to force a punt.
Falcons at their 20 with about 7:00 left. Andre Coleman drops Thomas Brown for a loss on 2nd down, leaving 3rd-and-long. 3rd-down pass for Brown is incomplete and would have gained three yards at best anyway. What the hell kind of drive was that, down a point?
Chargers with a great chance to grind the clock down at their 32 with 5:09 to go. Johnson explodes through a hole on 3rd-and-1 and is off to the races for 42 yards. Chris Owens, who left earlier with an injury, tracks him down. The Falcons unquestionably have a fast secondary. Chargers at the Falcon 18 with 3:15 left. The Falcons stuff two Johnson sweeps and Antoine Harris breaks up a pass to force another FG attempt. Kaeding hits from 35-36 to force Atlanta to score a TD in the last 2:00.
San Diego 24, Atlanta 20.
Atlanta starts at their 26. DPI on C.J. Spillman gives Atlanta 14 at the 2:00 warning. 14 more to Troy Bergeron, dancing with the stars to the Charger 46. 6 more and out of bounds to Robert Ferguson. Fouts informs us there are no four-point plays in football. GEE, YOU THINK SO? Great throw, great catch as Ferguson is down to the Charger 22. San Diego offering almost no resistance. Redman hits Chandler Williams the second time around, an impressive catch at the 17. Paul Oliver breaks up the next pass to force 4th-and-5. Redman, though, hits Bergeron at the 7-yard line and Atlanta uses its final timeout with 1:01 left. Falcons go trips right, and it's Bergeron dancing down to the 2 now. In what may be a fateful move, the Chargers have the wrong personnel on the field now and have to use a timeout at 0:34. Atlanta tries to make San Diego overthink by motioning a WR into the backfield, but the Chargers aren't buying, and stuff the middle handoff at the 2. The Rams would have totally sold out on that play last week. On 3rd and goal, Redman can't find anyone and actually ends up diving out of bounds at the 5 to stop the clock. 4th and goal, this is it. Here comes the blitz! Redman throws over the top of it to Eric Weems, who beats Simeon Castille with relative ease on a post pattern. Atlanta takes the lead with 9 seconds left.
Whitehurst's Hail Mary only makes the Falcon 25, and banks off Gary Banks' hands anyway, as the clock expires.
Final score: Falcons 27, Chargers 24.
MVP: Clearly Redman, 15-19-134, running for a TD and throwing for another in just over one quarter of play. Redman didn't appear to have many takers as a free agent in the offseason; lucky for Atlanta.
What did we learn: Well, San Diego tackles better than the Rams, for what that's worth. Rivers looked sensational. This is not the deep team at RB it used to be, though. They're very ordinary after Sproles. The Falcons are still blitzing like it's September 1939, and with their mighty struggles on third down tonight, you have to wonder if this team will be able to put enough pressure on good teams when it has to. And they do play a lot of good teams. Ryan still looks fine, though he should have been picked at least once.
Up next: My Sunday quadrupleheader goal has been shot down by circumstance, but we'll go for Steelers-Bills at noon on NFL Network anyway.
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